Life Navigation Mood Selection: “Healing Season” by Mint Condition (listen while you read to enhance the navigation experience)
Let’s start this season/off with some healing/let’s make it over/no more suffer/let’s start the healing/reconcile our feelings/let’s make it over/no more suffer
I am not certain where I am headed with this blog, but humor me because I believe the journey in my writing is the destination.
My senses and intuition have become even more sensitive and heightened the more I engage and interact with depth and intention with my soul/life’s journey. What used to be more analytical and intellectual activities has turned to highly sensitive seeing, listening, and being. My awareness and observatory skills are heightened; what were simple everyday actions and thoughts have become complex metaphors of reflection and active life lessons for the now. When I reflect on the season, the coming of solstice, light, sacred nights, I cringe knowing how beautiful this metaphor is for living but how non-reflective and anxiety ridden we humans become at this time of year. It is not something I look forward to anymore and I guess I am looking for some resolve of it. Of wanting to feel the peace, the love, the happiness of giving, but I don’t.
Maybe it is that I miss the peaceful time spent with my parents and sisters and the laughter that filled our home. Missing the sweet communion and celebration with friends every year and seeing how the older we’ve gotten the less we commune around this time. The growing monetary disparity that locks us into thinking we can’t give anything because we didn’t have enough to buy a gift. And, the growing discomfort of this “holy-day” season being gentrified by installations of “black friday’s” latest editions of comfort and joy. Happy Holidays…
Here’s the real reflective and metaphorical stuff that has come up for me the past few weeks. Since moving back to the west coast, I’ve noticed even more so the normal everyday higher anxiety living on this side. By normal, I mean normal. This is everyday life, to move, speak, be at an almost break neck pace or get left behind or in a wreck on the 405. It is the way of life, and for several who have relocated, it is a great way of life. The energy surge of activities, the cultural events, concerts, the beach, the sun…is just what some seek when coming here. Yes, I have enjoyed the energy high of the land here and the air. It has been wonderful to wake up to the sun everyday since being here; Seasonal Affective Disorder be damned. Though I’ve never lived on the east coast, I have family there and have experienced the very fast movement of the I-495 drivers and the 295 Beltway. I can only imagine New York, have never been but am eager to experience it. Once again, the energy, the excitement of life that is present in the frenzy is magnetizing right? And my beloved mid-west where I was born and raised, experiences a bit of it all in different parts. The residuals of what used to be “the west” with its bustling textile and manufacturing industry have hit some hard times in recent years. It is a land locked environment, no beaches, and longer and colder winters than usual for this Sun fixed Leo. The longer nights can assist already depressed feelings, feelings of loss and pain that can intensify anxiety. The beauty of living there is in the simplicity, the gift of a slower pace of life, more laid back livity, good salt of the earth people. And it works for those of us who lived there (proud mid-westerner I am).
Our country (east, west, mid-west, north, south) is a metaphor for how our bodies experience this sudden surge of power. Our hands, head, feet, face, ears all sense the initial surge of energy from a new sensory experience. This sensory experience is translated through our thoughts and we physiologically respond as either hot, cold, warm, nervous sweaty palms or cold frigid feet. The sensory experience is exhilarating, but too much and we get frost-bitten, heat stroke, or burned if we’re not monitoring our internal body’s response to this new power surge. Our organs grow tired of the relentless stress. We can overload the circuit, the outlet can explode, and the machine stops working; it gradually shuts down. But the whole time while the light was blinking to warn us of the emergence of extreme energy surges, we kept plugging in and plugging in and plugging in…
So, I wonder if we are plugging in to get this power all the time because we think if we stop, we will die? Are we fooled into believing we have to stay plugged in and feed our bodies, our spirits, our emotions with constant surges of power in order to be in a state of aliveness? When you look at a flame and then look away, do you forget what the flame looks like? Or do you have enough selective retentive abilities to re-member the flame, the light? We’re not comfortable in this ritualistic rite of passage of liminality, of being betwixt and between. Of releasing the need to do anything this season. It is truly a test of our willingness to be with ourselves if just for a day, a night, maybe 40 nights. To give the gift of ourselves and be the Present. To not be so stressed about whose cooking the dinner and where the best sales are on hams and turkeys. To take some time to talk, really talk and BE with our families and friends.
We’re not comfortable with un-plugging from the daily surges and just being for the sake of being. I get the giving and getting and desire to “celebrate” the season. I want to consider using this time of the year to be at peace with sustaining the energy within me during this season of holy-days or healing days as I like to reframe them. Recharging, retooling, and reflecting on this season of light teaches me to wrestle not with flesh and blood, and to use every tool I have within me. Refuel, re-energize, and re-Gift the Best of Me to my life’s work and to the ones I love. Then, I’ll be ready to receive new energy, the now power surges for the next season.
Let’s heal it up, let’s patch it up, let’s heal it up…right now…