Did you abandon your magic?

This question has come up a few times for me in the past year, year and a half. My seemingly inconsistent posts throughout the year, my removal of videos from my YouTube channel, and full and public embrace of being a full-time therapist/counselor. I’ve felt like I owe an explanation to those who have whole heartedly embraced me as a spiritual and professional coach, a Voyager tarot reader, and Reiki Master practitioner. Thank you, first and foremost, for thinking of me. I shut stuff down after coming through the pandemic. My spirit, my energy levels, my emotions were all going through transitions.

Although I appreciated the sacred Pause my eyes remained fixed on my timeline to people infected and dying from the virus and the murders of Ahmaud Arbery and George Floyd. Having had the virus twice myself and was working in a hospital at the time of the outbreak, I was managing the roller coaster of physical ailment with my own conjure of herbs, natural and allopathic medications. But, the murders silenced me. I was mad, frustrated, tired, weary, and all around pissed!! I had become too familiar with the killing of black people at the hands of police. A lot of the spiritual bypassing happening in the spiritual/healing facilitators groups online and all the bandwagon folks really bothered me. People’s true colors came through and all the “we are one, we are light” talk from some (please note, not all) of the white/majority culture individuals just wasn’t sitting well with me. It was the experiences of feeling unseen, unheard, dismissed, and invalidated in these spiritual spaces that culminated with these series of events that I and the world watched in 2020 that was unacceptable to me. And there was an urgency I felt to respond and to be responsible with my talents and gifts going forward. I didn’t feel like sharing or being online. I just wanted to quit. 

So, I withdrew from everything and allowed my presence to dip into the background so I could heal. I didn’t know it was healing that was happening, but I came out on the other side of it feeling renewed…restored. It was an intense time that I spent in deep meditation and prayer with my ancestors; more than I’ve ever prayed before. And yes, spending time reading and learning about my ancestral roots and paying homage to my ancestors and dancing in community with other African descended beings definitely helped me re-discover myself. It was a time for reconvening, reckoning, and awakening. And from it, I reconciled with my work as a counselor. I accepted and embraced it and decided to show up fully in it for the health and well being of my community. And, I could do both, counseling and coaching. AND…I still got my magic! The intuitive, the personal development, the spiritual work is how I show up. It never went anywhere; it just grew deeper roots. 🪄🔮

I committed to my well-being. Are you ready to commit to yours?